“Buy what you like” is all well and good, but it does not a cellarmaster make. Every long-term wine collector has looked up at some point and realized that 10, 25, or even 100 cases they are holding just don’t excite them anymore. There are, of course, good solutions to this problem, like donating to a local wine charity or liquidating part of one’s cellar at auction. But a little bit of foresight goes a long way when it comes to preventing the kind of “cellar remorse” that is so common among seasoned collectors.
When you’ve looked at as many cellars as I have, their problems begin to form themselves into categories – what I’m calling “cellar traps”. Like vine diseases in the vineyard, a particular buyer can be afflicted by more than one of these maladies. Also like vine diseases, they are not wholly preventable. However, with a bit of care they can be kept in check, maximizing the pleasure a good cellar can provide over time. Today we’ll look at a few of the most common cellar traps and how they can be avoided.
The Negative Cellar
In art, the use of negative space frames the subject and creates a surprising, distinctive composition. In the negative cellar, what is not being consumed begins to define the shape of the collection. Wines that are purchased but not consumed can often be justified at first – perhaps this wine needs further aging or that one is more suited to a different season – but before long certain styles begin to pile up, and it becomes clear that purchasing is the core issue.
The Solution: When caught early, the negative cellar is easily remedied. If tannic reds are piling up and Champagne always seems to be in short supply, one simply shifts the purchasing mix and soon the cellar comes back into balance. However, the most extreme cases of this malady are usually caused by long-term producer wine club memberships. When multiple vintages – sometimes dozens – accumulate without consumption, it may be time to cull a few of the club memberships and re-allocate those resources toward the styles one never seems to have enough of. As the bard says, it’s hard to say goodbye. But just think of it as saying hello to the wines one actually drinks.
The Someday Cellar
In the past, when traditional routes to market were often the only way to access top wines, stocking cases of new-release wines in need of cellar age or buying Bordeaux en primeur was a mark of prudence and long-term vision. These days, when 2006 Gaja Barbaresco is only marginally more expensive than 2022, the financial prospect of tying up too much capital in a wine meant to age 10 or 20 years looks less appealing. Yes, buying some producers on release still makes sense, and yes, provenance is key (this is one reason why Grand Cru Direct only deals in pre-arrivals that are stored in bond), but a cellar chock-full of “someday” wines is more financially dubious than ever in the current market.
The Solution: Compare prices of mature vintages against current releases, factoring in the time value of money and (probably more importantly) the cellar space an aging wine will occupy, plus the decade or more you’ll wait to enjoy it. Often, paying a 10-25% premium on a mature vintage is just a better play. Not to mention it frees up space and capital for the occasional current release or en primeur that really seems worth it.
The Armchair Cellar
I have a quote hanging by my front door by the late, great oceanographer, filmmaker, and author Jacques Cousteau: “Il faut aller voir” – “We must go and see for ourselves”. In the post-critic age of Instagram, there is no shortage of established, “iconic” names that the aspiring collector can source from their feed, a book, or even a simple Google search, all without ever ducking their head to enter a dark cellar or scaling the steep, terraced slopes of a vineyard-laden hillside.
Despite my insistence on blind tasting and focus on academic understanding of the wine world, even I know that wine is as much an emotional and personal pursuit as it is a technical one, and perhaps more so. The cellar of a well-heeled armchair collector can be stuffed to the gills with trophy wines and storied names, but the experience it affords pales in comparison to sharing a humbler bottle with a true collector – one who has followed Cousteau’s advice.
The Solution: Go and see for yourself. A cellar is far richer when its owner has a personal connection to the winemakers and terroirs whose produce fills its shelves, especially today, when a few hours on Google and Wine-Searcher can build an “iconic” cellar for those with the means to stock it.
The Neophyte Cellar
Fifteen-year-olds don’t often get married, and that’s a good thing. Our first loves can teach us foundational truths about ourselves and about how to build a great relationship, but they rarely hand us a partner well suited for the long haul. The same is true in wine. If you are early in your journey, you will fall head over heels for a producer or region and want to purchase everything you can get your hands on. Ninety-nine times out of a hundred, this is a mistake. Your taste in wine will continue to progress, but those three cases of single-vineyard Petite Sirah will still be full of 15.5% ABV oak bombs.
The Solution: For those beginning their wine journey or becoming more serious about collecting, “wide and shallow” is often a better strategy than “narrow and deep”. The upside of going heavy on a producer you’re sure will be the next Charles Lachaux is far smaller than the downside of overinvesting in a wine you’ll lose interest in next month. A curated monthly or quarterly wine club (particularly one focused on exceptional, ready-to-drink bottles like the one here at Grand Cru Direct) can be a good option to expand your producer and/or regional exposure without over-investment.
Collecting wine is a lifelong pursuit, and while there should be no urgency to rush things along, a little perspective can often prevent a lot of “cellar remorse”. That said, don’t be afraid to take a few fliers on under-the-radar producers, particularly those you’ve visited or with whom you have some personal connection. After all, as Miley rightly said, “It’s the climb.” I don’t have that one framed anywhere in my house, but maybe I should.